How to Understand Your Emotions (What NO ONE Tells You)
Feb 12
For a long time, I believed that if I just worked harder, stayed disciplined, and kept chasing the next milestone, everything would eventually feel right.
Professionally, I was doing everything “right.”
Externally, things looked successful.
Internally, something felt… misaligned.
Eventually, I realized the problem wasn’t ambition, gratitude, or effort.
Instead, the real issue was that no one had ever taught me how to work with my emotions instead of being quietly run by them.
That realization is exactly why I invited Saren Eads onto the Superbloom Coach podcast to have a deep, honest conversation about emotional wealth—the invisible skill that determines how fulfilled, energized, and grounded we feel inside our success.
Throughout this episode, we explored why emotional wealth sits at the foundation of financial freedom, time freedom, and sustainable ambition—and why so many high-achieving women feel exhausted even after “winning.”
What Emotional Wealth Really Means
When I first heard the phrase emotional wealth, something immediately clicked.
Most conversations around success focus on money or time.
Rarely do we talk about whether we actually have the emotional capacity to enjoy what we’re building.
From my perspective, emotional wealth is the ability to experience the full range of emotions—without resisting them, suppressing them, or letting them dictate our behavior.
Through my conversation with Saren, emotional wealth became clearly defined as:
- The ability to process emotions instead of avoiding them
- The capacity to feel alive and energized, not just productive
- The foundation that allows financial and time freedom to actually feel fulfilling
Without emotional wealth, success can feel heavy, stressful, or strangely empty.
With emotional wealth, growth feels expansive, intentional, and sustainable.
Why Emotional Wealth Is the Missing Piece for High-Achieving Women
So many women I work with—and honestly, myself included—were taught to intellectualize everything.
We learned how to think, plan, analyze, and perform.
We were never taught how to feel.
During my conversation with Saren, we talked about how most women try to think their way out of emotional overwhelm.
However, neuroscience tells a very different story.
Scientifically, emotions last about 90 seconds—unless we resist, judge, or intellectualize them.
That resistance is what keeps emotions looping for years instead of minutes.
Once I truly understood that, everything shifted.
Emotional Wealth and the Brain—Why Feeling Is Not Weakness
One of my biggest takeaways from this conversation was the role of the prefrontal cortex.
When we’re emotionally overwhelmed, the part of the brain responsible for decision-making and critical thinking goes offline.
Curiosity, body awareness, and neutrality are what bring it back online.
Rather than forcing clarity, emotional wealth teaches us how to regulate first—then think clearly.
That distinction alone explains why so many capable women feel stuck despite having the “right” mindset tools.
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The Three-Part Emotional Wealth Framework
1. Emotional Wealth Begins With Mindset
From my perspective as both a coach and entrepreneur, mindset isn’t about forcing positivity.
Mindset determines how we interpret our lives, our work, and ourselves inside of it all.
During our conversation, Saren shared something that deeply resonated with me:
emotional wealth means building success in a way that feels authentic to your nervous system.
Some people thrive under pressure.
Others shut down.
Personally, hustle and urgency do not bring out my best energy.
Alignment does.
When mindset honors how you actually function, emotional wealth naturally expands.
2. Emotional Wealth Requires Emotional Regulation
This was one of the most powerful parts of our discussion.
Most of our subconscious patterns live in the body, not the mind.
Avoidance behaviors—like overworking, procrastinating, or staying “busy”—often signal unprocessed emotion.
Emotional wealth grows when we learn how to:
- Feel sensations in the body without judgment
- Describe emotions neutrally instead of catastrophizing them
- Let emotions move through us rather than getting stuck
One of the most eye-opening realizations for me was that resistance is what actually hurts—not the emotion itself.
Once I began allowing emotions to be felt fully, they stopped controlling my behavior.
3. Emotional Wealth Is Sustained Through Vitality
The third pillar of emotional wealth is something I don’t hear talked about nearly enough—vitality.
Emotional wealth requires energy.
Through Saren’s personal story, we explored how biological factors—like hormones, cortisol, and nutrient deficiencies—can dramatically impact emotional resilience.
Until recently, I didn’t fully appreciate how much our baseline energy shapes our emotional experience.
When the body is depleted, emotional regulation becomes exponentially harder.
When vitality increases, emotional wealth becomes accessible instead of effortful.
Emotional Wealth and the Illusion of “Having to Choose”
One of my favorite moments in this conversation was when Saren talked about choosing both.
So many women believe success requires sacrifice:
- Career or motherhood
- Ambition or peace
- Wealth or emotional fulfillment
Emotional wealth dissolves that false binary.
Through this work, I’ve seen over and over again that women don’t need to give up what matters most—they need the emotional capacity to hold it.
Emotional Wealth, Abundance, and Overwhelm
One concept that genuinely gave me chills was when Saren said:
“Abundance and overwhelm feel almost identical in the body.”
That single insight reframed so much for me.
Often, overwhelm isn’t a sign that something is wrong.
Instead, overwhelm can signal expansion beyond our emotional capacity.
Emotional wealth allows us to increase that capacity—so growth feels exciting instead of destabilizing.
Choosing Emotions on Purpose Without Bypassing
Throughout this episode, we talked about the difference between thinking positive and feeling intentionally.
Positive emotions don’t come from affirmations alone.
They come from allowing the body to fully experience pleasure, awe, and joy—without immediately moving on.
I’ve personally experienced how uncomfortable it can feel to let good emotions linger.
Emotional wealth teaches us to stay present long enough for those feelings to integrate.
Emotional Wealth, Self-Worth, and Visibility
One area I’ve been personally working through is self-worth—especially as visibility increases.
Even confident women often carry subconscious beliefs around:
- “Who am I to have this?”
- “Do I really deserve this?”
- “What will people think?”
Through emotional wealth, self-worth becomes embodied rather than debated.
Instead of trying to convince ourselves we’re worthy, we learn how to feel safe receiving.
Why Emotional Wealth Changes Everything
Looking back, I can clearly see how emotional wealth changed my relationship with success.
Without emotional wealth, growth felt stressful and fragile.
With emotional wealth, ambition feels grounded and expansive.
Rather than chasing outcomes, emotional wealth allows us to build from stability first.
Final Thoughts on Emotional Wealth
This conversation with Saren Eads reminded me that success is not just something we achieve—it’s something we experience.
Emotional wealth determines whether we feel alive inside our lives or merely accomplished.
If you’re building something meaningful but quietly feeling disconnected, emotional wealth may be the missing piece.
And once you cultivate it, everything else expands with far more ease.
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